We are coming upto three years since the knock, if I knew then what I know now then things would have been much easier. To say it was treading through mud is an understatement.
We are ten social workers on, who I have to say have provided no support what so ever, critissm , judgement, and being told what to do, luckily I have stood my ground.
I have done nothing wrong, I’m a good mother and a caring, supportive wife. But if it hadn’t have been for the support I have found along this journey we would not be where we are now.
At first I didn’t have anyone, fear of talking to anyone not even family, few people knew what was going on, my husband wasn’t living at home and no one knew.
I kept this to myself for five months, got through Christmas etc. Then five months on my husband tried to kill himself and I was left to tell both our families what he had done and why, luckily they were supportive. I had some mental health support through work and I also then reached out to The Lucy Faithful foundation and often phoned the helpline and regularly reading the forum.
We carried on as a family the best we could. After sentence I had already organised I would contact Childrens Heard and Seen, and it was there I met the most amazing resilient women. I still attend the group meetings but is the chat with these ladies separately which have helped me so much. I found twitter helped, writing everything down even if it doesn’t go anywhere and blogging. The world according to the knock has been invaluable, especially the podcasts and advice given on a more personal level.
We are not there yet but if there is one peice of advice seek support from the very beginning from people who truly know what we are going through, those with the lived experience, no story will be the same but I guarantee someone will be able to help. You are not alone with this.
Brilliantly written!! x